I'm starting to notice I'm doing some stupid things. I'm pretty sure my baby is sucking my brain cells out.
Here is an example. I put clothes in the dryer the other day but did not turn the dryer on. Instead I turned the washer on and went upstairs. I kept hearing water running and couldn't figure out why. Suddenly it dawned on me I turned the wrong knob. The washer was full of water and twisting and whirling away with no clothes in it. Meanwhile the dryer was full of wet clothes just sitting there.
The other night I was at my parents' and had my bag on the dining room table while we talked. Then we left to go get something to eat but took separate cars (hubby and me in one, Mom and my "baby" sister in the other) since my mom had to go food shopping after dinner right near where we were eating dinner. I did not notice this until we got in the car after dinner but there was a water bottle in my cupholder that was not mine. It was not my husband's either. I sent my sister a text asking her if she had a particular brand of water bottle and she said she did but she could not find it. I guess I just took her bottle with me and put it in my cupholder although I have NO RECOLLECTION of doing so!
In other news I had a weekend where I spent a lot of time in thought! On Friday I decided I was switching to the new midwife and I thought I was at peace with my decision but it nagged and nagged at me. I realized I still wanted a homebirth and did not try hard enough to find someone who would support me through this. I Googled a search term I guess I had not used before because I hit the jackpot this time! I found several midwifery practices in our area that do only homebirths/water births (no hospitals or birthing centers). I emailed two of them right away. One wrote back almost immediately to say she could not travel to my area and she is full for November anyway. Her partner would have traveled to my area but will still be out on maternity leave when it's time for me to give birth. She did give me two suggestions though, one of which I had already written to. I heard back from both of those women today. I have a consultation iwth the one on Firday! The other one also offered me a consultation but I have not written back to her yet simply because I'm not sure how I can take all this time off work. I'm wondering if I should meet with the one, see if it feels like a match, and only meet with the other one if I don't feel good with the first one. So many decisions! I feel like this is one of the most important decisions of my life though! And I guess that is why I just cannot "settle" for something I'm not keen on. Ever since finding these women I've been so excited. I feel like my heart is finally happy! I hope it can stay happy and that I have luck with one or more of these women. Both have told me that they do not base their decisions on weight alone but on the overall health of the mom. So let's hope one of these works out! It is what my heart desires!
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