It's already been a year since we found out our baby was on the way! Ever since I got out of high school it seems time goes by so quickly. But I have to say this last year must be the fastest ever! It really seems like I was just running out to the store to buy the little baseball shirt to give to my husband to tell him the exciting news and now it's over a year already.
Our little guy continues to bring so much joy to our lives. He babbles and coos and grins and laughs. He makes me smile. He is fussier than normal since he's teething but he is still a very good baby. My favorite time of day is when he first wakes and is just all smiles. I bring him into bed with me and nurse him and then we stay there for awhile. I am in no hurry for him to move to his own room. He is still in the Rock 'n Play Sleeper and I will keep him in there as long as possible. We actually sold the cosleeper bassinet on Saturday. I was not too attached to it. We had bought it used, only used it for about 4.5 weeks (when we got home until he was about 5 weeks) and then it was basically just a changing table for awhile. I did not like how it took up ALL the room between my bed and the wall (width) and blocked my nightstand. I kept bumping my incision on it as it was the exact level my incision was.
I am doing my best to fill out his baby book but sometimes I am just at a loss. For instance there is a space to write down when baby discovers hands and feet. Well, he has been sucking on his thumb since he was just a day or two old. Now he has abandoned his thumb and shoves the whole hand in there as many fingers as he can get until he gags himself. Is that discovering his hands? I don't know. As for his feet he has definitely been looking at them before but he hasn't grabbed for them yet that I recall. I'm trying not to make myself crazy with having this perfect baby book but it's hard. He is my first and I hold myself to this high standard! Except for the "baby's firsts" page I think I'm doing a good job.
I started cloth diapering part-time last week. I bought 10 diapers from Just Simply Baby. I really like them so far! He leaked (pee) out of one which I found odd. I'm going to make note of that one next time he wears it as I'm wondering if it might be defective. It was during the day and he'd only been wearing it a short time. He has worn them overnight and he has pooped in them and all the others have held everything in so it was odd to me that that one could leak. He looks so cute in them too! I am thinking of buying about 20 more. I also just switched to Target disposables. A huge box arrived yesterday. I had some in size 1 from the baby shower and they worked great. Mostly we were using Huggies and we only recently were getting to the point where we needed to buy them as we'd received so many as gifts. So far all we bought was a 33-pack of newborns that he used immediately (even though in the hospital they put size 1s on him right away), and then we bought the big packs of 2s and 3s in the Pure & Natural and we've used the 2s so far. And now I just bought a 96-pack of size 2s of Target's brand. Other than some size 3 Huggies in the denim design and some size 3 Huggies our shower stash is gone. It lasted us a good two months though, maybe longer, so that was great! And now with using cloth part-time I should not have to buy so many.
Today we went to a new chiropractor. It is right down the street so I put him in the stroller and off we went. Going there was downhill so it was easy. Coming home was harder since I was pushing up the hill. I made it though. Ha ha. We had a 4:00 appointment so I arrived around 3:50 to fill out paperwork. It was a complicated process. We met with one woman, and then we met with the chiropractor who examined the baby and did a sort of examination on me (watched my posture, felt my spine, etc.), and then he left and the woman examined me further and X-rayed my neck. They wouldn't X-ray anything else since I am breastfeeding. I did not even get an adjustment though and I'm hurting! And we were there til 5:30! I go back Monday for my results. Who knows if we'll get adjustments then though? I picked this chiropractor for two reasons. 1) It's down the street. 2) It's in network. Then I find out today as of March 1, they'll no longer be in network with my insurance company. What a bummer!
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Thursday, February 23, 2012
February...flying by!
What a busy month! Our little guy had his first Super Bowl, first Valentine's Day, and his mommy's birthday - his first here to celebrate! Last year he had just been conceived on my birthday!
I'm still so emotional about the fact I actually have a living breathing son after our battle with infertility and the trauma of his birth! At the La Leche League meeting last week (my first day one) which happened to fall on Valentine's Day we were asked to say what we'd say in a Valentine to our babies. To my embarrassment, I started bawling! I said that I'd tell him he was the greatest thing that ever happened and then I just cried while choking out that last year I wasn't even sure I could have a baby and we were going through fertility treatment - to a roomful of strangers! I wanted to die! Why did I have to keep babbling? Oh, well, I'm human and more specifically I'm a woman still in the postpartum stage and I hope they can all handle that. Some of them needed tissues too!
For Valentine's Day the three of us just stayed in. My hubby got me a card and also a card from our son. It was so adorable! He got me flowers and Marc Jacobs Daisy perfume (smells great!). We cooked a steak and lobster dinner at home.
For my birthday we went out to dinner. (I also went out to lunch with my son and two friends from work.) Hubby got me more cards and more flowers and a Kindle Fire! I'm so excited!
I only have six weeks left with my little guy full-time and I'm quite sad about it but really working on not dwelling on that! I do not get much done around the house. I'm keeping up on the laundry and I vacuum and clean the bathrooms but not much else. My husband does the dishes in case you are picturing a sink full of dishes. Well, to be precise, I should say he loads the dishwasher. I hand-wash anything that needs handwashing, which is my breastpump parts and bottles. Last week it was also a mandoline slicer which I sliced my finger on while cleaning! Ouch! It's the pointer ringer right next to the middle finger which I cut on the same tool a little over two years ago!
I'm having second thoughts about the daycare I chose but I'm thinking I'm just getting jittery since it's getting closer and I'm filled with anxiety about leaving my baby boy there! We stopped by on Monday. My husband had never been there; I chose it myself. Well, he had input on the money part! It was one of the less expensive one I saw, maybe the least expensive and it's still $221/week! There was one little boy about 13 months old crawling around with no pants and only one shoe and one sock. It really bothered me! He did take them off himself according to the teacher but she never attempted to put them back on the whole time we were there. I am going to pay extra for the web cam access. If I don't like what I see I will be calling!
I'm still so emotional about the fact I actually have a living breathing son after our battle with infertility and the trauma of his birth! At the La Leche League meeting last week (my first day one) which happened to fall on Valentine's Day we were asked to say what we'd say in a Valentine to our babies. To my embarrassment, I started bawling! I said that I'd tell him he was the greatest thing that ever happened and then I just cried while choking out that last year I wasn't even sure I could have a baby and we were going through fertility treatment - to a roomful of strangers! I wanted to die! Why did I have to keep babbling? Oh, well, I'm human and more specifically I'm a woman still in the postpartum stage and I hope they can all handle that. Some of them needed tissues too!
For Valentine's Day the three of us just stayed in. My hubby got me a card and also a card from our son. It was so adorable! He got me flowers and Marc Jacobs Daisy perfume (smells great!). We cooked a steak and lobster dinner at home.
For my birthday we went out to dinner. (I also went out to lunch with my son and two friends from work.) Hubby got me more cards and more flowers and a Kindle Fire! I'm so excited!
I only have six weeks left with my little guy full-time and I'm quite sad about it but really working on not dwelling on that! I do not get much done around the house. I'm keeping up on the laundry and I vacuum and clean the bathrooms but not much else. My husband does the dishes in case you are picturing a sink full of dishes. Well, to be precise, I should say he loads the dishwasher. I hand-wash anything that needs handwashing, which is my breastpump parts and bottles. Last week it was also a mandoline slicer which I sliced my finger on while cleaning! Ouch! It's the pointer ringer right next to the middle finger which I cut on the same tool a little over two years ago!
I'm having second thoughts about the daycare I chose but I'm thinking I'm just getting jittery since it's getting closer and I'm filled with anxiety about leaving my baby boy there! We stopped by on Monday. My husband had never been there; I chose it myself. Well, he had input on the money part! It was one of the less expensive one I saw, maybe the least expensive and it's still $221/week! There was one little boy about 13 months old crawling around with no pants and only one shoe and one sock. It really bothered me! He did take them off himself according to the teacher but she never attempted to put them back on the whole time we were there. I am going to pay extra for the web cam access. If I don't like what I see I will be calling!
Monday, February 6, 2012
Breastfeeding
For awhile now (I'd say at least a month, but probably longer, maybe even since we brought him home) my little guy has a pretty alert period for a few hours before bed, starting at 10:00 or 11:00 p.m. I used to call it his fussy period but now I'm realizing he isn't really fussy during this time, just very alert. He usually doesn't settle down til 1:00 a.m. or later. Well, yesterday I was just exhausted. I felt I'd never make it til 2:00 a.m. At 10:00 p.m. I finished nursing him and put him in his Rock 'n Play sleeper. He was all smiles and wide awake.
When he was six weeks old I had started sleep training him, putting him down when he was drowsy but still awake. I don't take a lot of parenting advice from people especially when it's unsolicited (I'm stubborn) or from people I don't necessarily think are the greatest parents (ha ha!). But my postpartum doula and my sister had both told me different stories that made me want to do this. My postpartum doula had said that her little one nursed to sleep until she was quite old and I asked if that was a problem and she said it was. And now I don't remember what she said. Then I told my sister after I had been doing the sleep training for awhile that I would put my son down when he was drowsy but still awake and she said she did the same, she never let them nurse to sleep because she had seen too many of her friends have babies that would only nurse to sleep, and then if Mom couldn't be there for some reason, there was a problem. I wasn't sure if sleep training was "mean" but I feel I'm doing it in a kind way. If he has a legitimate issue, I will pick him up. If he seemed hungry still or if he needed a new diaper, I would not just leave him there. I don't believe in "crying it out." I stay right there with him for the most part. I will tidy up the bedroom or go in the bathroom (next room over) and wash my face and brush my teeth. I do not pick him up though unless, as I said, he has a real problem. He will sometimes fuss a bit and I give him a pacifier when he does this and I gently rock the RnP. And he always drifts right off to sleep.
So last night I was very tired. At 10:00 p.m. I was ready for sleep! I put him in there and he was happy but he did not look at all tired. I put on his "Frankie the Frog" (which has a heartbeat tone and lights), gave him a pacifier, turned off the lamp, and rocked him gently. He took an hour but he finally fell asleep.
This morning I woke up to my husband's alarm, something I haven't done for weeks since I'm usually so exhausted then, at 6:45. I felt wide awake and refreshed! I woke up my husband and my son was still sleeping away. I finally woke him at 7:40 because even though he didn't seem hungry, Mama needed him to eat!! (I was very full and it was getting uncomfortable.) He nursed but still seemed drowsy. I changed him and got my shower and nursed him again. I was all dressed and ready by 9:30 a.m.! It felt great and it was certainly a first. Next week I have a quite a few activities lined up (such a moms' meeting, an LLL meeting, and a moms matinee, which is a movie you can take your baby to without worry crying will disturb the other patrons because the other patrons are all mommies with babies too!) but this week I couldn't think of anything. I checked out the schedule for a local breastfeeding support center though and it just so happened that their support group was today so I went to that! I hadn't been there since I was about 37 weeks pregnant.
I am so blessed that breastfeeding is going so well. So many women really struggle with it, with supply issues, pain issues, latch issues, etc. And I know I'm extra lucky because I had a C-section and I know that can really hinder breastfeeding, not to mention I have PCOS which seems to cause supply issues for so many. I feel like the Universe decided to just give me successful breastfeeding since conception and birth did not come easy to me. (Pregnancy was great though and labor was OK until everything went wrong!) I don't think I'm depressed but I still find myself crying when I think about the labor and the birth and how things went. I feel like I cheated...and was cheated. I have to keep centering myself again and remembering just the sweet relief I felt when I heard my son's cries and knew he was all right. Right then I knew I had made the best decision I could have in that moment, not that I ever felt I made that decision. I just remember a doctor saying "C-section" and I nodded. I don't think they were really giving me an option at that point, at least not making it clear I had an option, and things were happening so quickly that it just felt like the next right step. If I learned one thing while giving birth, it was that everything changes and you can't really make plans. If I ever have another baby and write a birth plan, I think it will feel really silly to call it a plan. Plans change. Reality happens. I keep thinking of that saying, "We make plans and God laughs." I just keep trying to remember all this but I replay the events of those days (the day I was in labor, the day he was born, and the days after) over and over in my head. I don't recall a lot after he was born. I was so tired and I think the meds did not help. But my friend had a baby 8 days ago and I just read a lovely birth story and they just remind me of how mine did not go well and the tears start flowing!
So I am just super grateful that breastfeeding is going so well. I put my son on the scale while I was at the center and he was 16 pounds, 10 ounces. I do not count that as his official weight since he was fully clothed. Then I nursed him for 7 minutes and put him back on the scale and he was 16 pounds, 13.5 ounces! So I could tell he got 3.5 ounces in a feeding. I thought it was cool to have that knowledge. I always wonder how much he is getting! I can see how much I pump in a certain amount of time but that varies throughout the day. Hmm, I just realized though, that is liquid ounces and and the scale was weight. Ha ha, blond moment! But I think that is how lactation consultants figure if the baby is getting enough by weighing before and after a feeding so I'm not completely off base, nor I was the only mom there that did it. And my boy got 3.5 ounces in 7 minutes. Another baby got 4 ounces in 40 minutes. She is 5 weeks younger though so maybe he is just more efficient now in getting the milk out.
When he was six weeks old I had started sleep training him, putting him down when he was drowsy but still awake. I don't take a lot of parenting advice from people especially when it's unsolicited (I'm stubborn) or from people I don't necessarily think are the greatest parents (ha ha!). But my postpartum doula and my sister had both told me different stories that made me want to do this. My postpartum doula had said that her little one nursed to sleep until she was quite old and I asked if that was a problem and she said it was. And now I don't remember what she said. Then I told my sister after I had been doing the sleep training for awhile that I would put my son down when he was drowsy but still awake and she said she did the same, she never let them nurse to sleep because she had seen too many of her friends have babies that would only nurse to sleep, and then if Mom couldn't be there for some reason, there was a problem. I wasn't sure if sleep training was "mean" but I feel I'm doing it in a kind way. If he has a legitimate issue, I will pick him up. If he seemed hungry still or if he needed a new diaper, I would not just leave him there. I don't believe in "crying it out." I stay right there with him for the most part. I will tidy up the bedroom or go in the bathroom (next room over) and wash my face and brush my teeth. I do not pick him up though unless, as I said, he has a real problem. He will sometimes fuss a bit and I give him a pacifier when he does this and I gently rock the RnP. And he always drifts right off to sleep.
So last night I was very tired. At 10:00 p.m. I was ready for sleep! I put him in there and he was happy but he did not look at all tired. I put on his "Frankie the Frog" (which has a heartbeat tone and lights), gave him a pacifier, turned off the lamp, and rocked him gently. He took an hour but he finally fell asleep.
This morning I woke up to my husband's alarm, something I haven't done for weeks since I'm usually so exhausted then, at 6:45. I felt wide awake and refreshed! I woke up my husband and my son was still sleeping away. I finally woke him at 7:40 because even though he didn't seem hungry, Mama needed him to eat!! (I was very full and it was getting uncomfortable.) He nursed but still seemed drowsy. I changed him and got my shower and nursed him again. I was all dressed and ready by 9:30 a.m.! It felt great and it was certainly a first. Next week I have a quite a few activities lined up (such a moms' meeting, an LLL meeting, and a moms matinee, which is a movie you can take your baby to without worry crying will disturb the other patrons because the other patrons are all mommies with babies too!) but this week I couldn't think of anything. I checked out the schedule for a local breastfeeding support center though and it just so happened that their support group was today so I went to that! I hadn't been there since I was about 37 weeks pregnant.
I am so blessed that breastfeeding is going so well. So many women really struggle with it, with supply issues, pain issues, latch issues, etc. And I know I'm extra lucky because I had a C-section and I know that can really hinder breastfeeding, not to mention I have PCOS which seems to cause supply issues for so many. I feel like the Universe decided to just give me successful breastfeeding since conception and birth did not come easy to me. (Pregnancy was great though and labor was OK until everything went wrong!) I don't think I'm depressed but I still find myself crying when I think about the labor and the birth and how things went. I feel like I cheated...and was cheated. I have to keep centering myself again and remembering just the sweet relief I felt when I heard my son's cries and knew he was all right. Right then I knew I had made the best decision I could have in that moment, not that I ever felt I made that decision. I just remember a doctor saying "C-section" and I nodded. I don't think they were really giving me an option at that point, at least not making it clear I had an option, and things were happening so quickly that it just felt like the next right step. If I learned one thing while giving birth, it was that everything changes and you can't really make plans. If I ever have another baby and write a birth plan, I think it will feel really silly to call it a plan. Plans change. Reality happens. I keep thinking of that saying, "We make plans and God laughs." I just keep trying to remember all this but I replay the events of those days (the day I was in labor, the day he was born, and the days after) over and over in my head. I don't recall a lot after he was born. I was so tired and I think the meds did not help. But my friend had a baby 8 days ago and I just read a lovely birth story and they just remind me of how mine did not go well and the tears start flowing!
So I am just super grateful that breastfeeding is going so well. I put my son on the scale while I was at the center and he was 16 pounds, 10 ounces. I do not count that as his official weight since he was fully clothed. Then I nursed him for 7 minutes and put him back on the scale and he was 16 pounds, 13.5 ounces! So I could tell he got 3.5 ounces in a feeding. I thought it was cool to have that knowledge. I always wonder how much he is getting! I can see how much I pump in a certain amount of time but that varies throughout the day. Hmm, I just realized though, that is liquid ounces and and the scale was weight. Ha ha, blond moment! But I think that is how lactation consultants figure if the baby is getting enough by weighing before and after a feeding so I'm not completely off base, nor I was the only mom there that did it. And my boy got 3.5 ounces in 7 minutes. Another baby got 4 ounces in 40 minutes. She is 5 weeks younger though so maybe he is just more efficient now in getting the milk out.
Friday, February 3, 2012
Teething...already?
I think my boy might be teething already. He has been gnawing on his fists for a few days now and today he was just very very fussy all day, not like him at all. We gave him some Tylenol and he has been sleeping a lot since then. I hope he doesn't get teeth too soon but I don't ant him to be suffering like this for months on end either.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Laughing and babbling!
My baby boy is cracking up right now at his mobile on the swing. It is so cute to see. For awhile now he has been getting excited about things, so excited I think he is going to fly away. The arms and legs start flapping and he looks like he is swimming or flying!
I have not yet written down in his baby book that he is cooing since my mom said it actually sounds like they say "coo." I have not heard that yet though. I hope his babbling isn't actually cooing and I missed the boat. I would have no idea now what date or age to write down. And that makes me sad. He has been doing it at least a few weeks now.
I enjoy every moment with this little guy. Each morning I wake up and nurse him. He is my alarm clock, wakes me up with some little cries (he is a low crier, such a sweet sound). Then I change his diaper and as soon as I lie him down to do that he is just all ear-splitting grins. It's like he is so happy his wet diaper is coming off. He mostly sleeps about six hours every night. Last week after his shots when he wasn't feeling so good he was sleeping past 8:00 a.m. but now he is back to sleeping until about 7:00 or so. I bring him into bed with me and that is my favorite part of the day, cuddles with my boy! I would love to co-sleep all the time but I'm a little nervous about it and he is right next to me in his rock 'n play sleeper and I do bring him in once my hubby gets up for work.
I did wind up calling the doctor the day after my last post and she said it sounded like a normal reaction to the shots but if he did not get better to call and bring him in Friday morning. He got the shots on Monday and pretty much slept or cried all day Tuesday and Wednesday. As Thursday wore on, he seemed more like his old self.
I had been starting to bathe him every other day but I got nervous that was too often for his skin. I talked to someone whose baby is about 10 weeks older and she said she was doing twice a week and just moved to every three days just a few weeks ago so now I bathe him twice a week. I wipe him down really well in between with wipes. He always looks slightly startled when I clean him with those. I warm them in my hands first but I guess they are still too cold. I warm up the lotion in my hands too. Ahh, I just switched to Baby Magic and I love the scent so much more than Johnson's. Ir is such a nice smell!
In nine weeks he will be starting at his day care. That makes me so sad. I try not to dwell on it and just focus on the time we do have together. I have absolutely no desire to go back to work. Someone mentioned adult conversation and I said that did not matter to me. I always thought I was a career woman but I am just so sad. I keep saying to my husband, "Are you sure I have to go back?" Besides the money and benefits, the only thing good I can think about going back to work is getting back into a routine. Right now we are staying up late and waking up late. During the day I have a hard tine focusing and getting things done. I'm mostly just focused on my little guy. He is a full-time job.
I finally got around to ordering his newborn pictures that were taken two months ago! I needed MS Word to do it and our desktop computer died before Christmas. I was able to view the pictures and get what I needed to order our Christmas cards but I never could access Word on my netbook. My husband bought a new computer before Christmas and has been working on it for awhile. I finally just got on the computer for the first time and ordered the pictures. He has since had his picture taken at six weeks on January 3 by a photographer who came to the house. I still haven't seen those pictures yet. Some woman is supposed to come to the house to show us the pictures and we keep having scheduling issues. And I took him to Sears on January 19 to attempt to get a better "mommy & baby" picture since I didn't really love the one I got from the newborn photographer. I was strong and stuck to my guns and ordered only the "free collage." When I picked them up on Monday though they had three more prints in the envelope and offered them to be for $5 for one, $10 for two, or $13 for all three. Of course, sucker that I am, I bought all three. One was a calendar and I thought my husband would like it for his desk but he already has two calendars on his desk. Oh, well. I am planning to get his picture taken at three, six, and nine months as well. I will probably go to JC Penney for those. But I might do Valentine's Day as well, maybe at Picture People or back to Sears. Yes, I'm picture crazy!
I have not yet written down in his baby book that he is cooing since my mom said it actually sounds like they say "coo." I have not heard that yet though. I hope his babbling isn't actually cooing and I missed the boat. I would have no idea now what date or age to write down. And that makes me sad. He has been doing it at least a few weeks now.
I enjoy every moment with this little guy. Each morning I wake up and nurse him. He is my alarm clock, wakes me up with some little cries (he is a low crier, such a sweet sound). Then I change his diaper and as soon as I lie him down to do that he is just all ear-splitting grins. It's like he is so happy his wet diaper is coming off. He mostly sleeps about six hours every night. Last week after his shots when he wasn't feeling so good he was sleeping past 8:00 a.m. but now he is back to sleeping until about 7:00 or so. I bring him into bed with me and that is my favorite part of the day, cuddles with my boy! I would love to co-sleep all the time but I'm a little nervous about it and he is right next to me in his rock 'n play sleeper and I do bring him in once my hubby gets up for work.
I did wind up calling the doctor the day after my last post and she said it sounded like a normal reaction to the shots but if he did not get better to call and bring him in Friday morning. He got the shots on Monday and pretty much slept or cried all day Tuesday and Wednesday. As Thursday wore on, he seemed more like his old self.
I had been starting to bathe him every other day but I got nervous that was too often for his skin. I talked to someone whose baby is about 10 weeks older and she said she was doing twice a week and just moved to every three days just a few weeks ago so now I bathe him twice a week. I wipe him down really well in between with wipes. He always looks slightly startled when I clean him with those. I warm them in my hands first but I guess they are still too cold. I warm up the lotion in my hands too. Ahh, I just switched to Baby Magic and I love the scent so much more than Johnson's. Ir is such a nice smell!
In nine weeks he will be starting at his day care. That makes me so sad. I try not to dwell on it and just focus on the time we do have together. I have absolutely no desire to go back to work. Someone mentioned adult conversation and I said that did not matter to me. I always thought I was a career woman but I am just so sad. I keep saying to my husband, "Are you sure I have to go back?" Besides the money and benefits, the only thing good I can think about going back to work is getting back into a routine. Right now we are staying up late and waking up late. During the day I have a hard tine focusing and getting things done. I'm mostly just focused on my little guy. He is a full-time job.
I finally got around to ordering his newborn pictures that were taken two months ago! I needed MS Word to do it and our desktop computer died before Christmas. I was able to view the pictures and get what I needed to order our Christmas cards but I never could access Word on my netbook. My husband bought a new computer before Christmas and has been working on it for awhile. I finally just got on the computer for the first time and ordered the pictures. He has since had his picture taken at six weeks on January 3 by a photographer who came to the house. I still haven't seen those pictures yet. Some woman is supposed to come to the house to show us the pictures and we keep having scheduling issues. And I took him to Sears on January 19 to attempt to get a better "mommy & baby" picture since I didn't really love the one I got from the newborn photographer. I was strong and stuck to my guns and ordered only the "free collage." When I picked them up on Monday though they had three more prints in the envelope and offered them to be for $5 for one, $10 for two, or $13 for all three. Of course, sucker that I am, I bought all three. One was a calendar and I thought my husband would like it for his desk but he already has two calendars on his desk. Oh, well. I am planning to get his picture taken at three, six, and nine months as well. I will probably go to JC Penney for those. But I might do Valentine's Day as well, maybe at Picture People or back to Sears. Yes, I'm picture crazy!
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